Balancing Act

Dancing queen Brooke Burke knows the importance of being a devoted mom--and making time for yourself, too.

After an amazing first-place finish on ABC's Dancing with the Stars (just eight months after the birth of her son, Shaya), Brooke Burke is going to be spending a lot more time in the spotlight this year. In addition to making multiple TV appearances, the mother of four is developing an online forum for women called babooshbaby.com. "I want to build a community where moms can share information," she says of her current project. "No matter what you're going through as a woman and mother, there is another woman going through it, too."

Burke knows a thing or two about being a mom. In addition to Shaya and daughter Rain, 2, with her finacé, singer-actor David Charvet, she has two daughters from a previous marriage: Neriah, 9, and Sierra, 7. Here, Burke talks about taking chances, the challenges of breastfeeding and how she manages the demands of a family of six:


Q| How are you juggling four kids, with two under the age of 3?
A| Three kids were easy. Four rocked my world. It's always been my goal to find a balance between being able to devote time to my professional life and time to my family and not let one compromise the other. I've always wanted to have a lot of children, and I'm used to the chaos. But, it's challenging having two babies in diapers and two babies not yet sleeping through the night.

Q| What's a typical day like at your house?
A| I have breakfast with all four kids and then I often take Rain with me to drop off Neriah and Sierra at school, while Shaya stays home. Having Shaya, I finally had to accept the fact that I can't do it all myself and I had to learn how to delegate, so I do have people helping me at home with my children. I never had a live-in nanny when I had just three kids. But with four, I physically cannot be everywhere at the same time. I try to get all my work done during the day and we always have dinner together as a family, David included.

Q| What kind of dad is David?
A| He is completely hands on. He feeds the babies. He changes diapers. He gets up with them during the night. He's very affectionate with the kids, and he spends a lot of time with them. He is an amazing father.

Q| What did you learn from your experience on Dancing with the Stars that you can bring to being a mom?
A| As moms and as women, fear sometimes gets in our way. By competing on Dancing with the Stars, I really took a chance. It was the biggest commitment I have ever made professionally to anything. My children saw what it was like to dedicate your time to something, to sacrifice and to really accomplish something. I practiced eight hours a day, seven days a week; I communicated openly with the kids about why I was gone so much and what I was doing, and they supported me. As a family it really brought us closer.

Q| How are you staying in shape now that you're not dancing every day?
A| I take long walks. I also try to do Pilates two to three times a week and work in a little bit of cardio and stretching. I don't have time to work out every day, but I try to exercise at home whenever I can.

Q| How do you spend your time with Rain and Shaya?
A| Rain is in a mommy-andtoddler class with me on Tuesdays and Thursdays, while Shaya and I grab our moments when we can. He's little enough that I take him to work with me. During Dancing with the Stars he spent a lot of time with me on set. When Rain is napping I'll take a walk with Shaya or get down on the floor with him and play. I think that's the biggest challenge for moms with multiple kids: finding the time to spend with each of them individually.

Q| Did you breastfeed Shaya?
A| I breastfed Shaya for a week. Nursing has never been easy for me. I breastfed Rain for eight months; but between feeding and pumping, it was a 24-hour job. It was really important to me to breastfeed my children, but with Shaya, I had to let go of that pressure and guilt. I wanted that bonding experience, but my body just couldn't do it--I wasn't producing milk--so I had to give myself a break.

Q| What's your best advice for new moms?
A| Everybody is going to tell you the "right way" to be a mom. I don't think there is a right way. It's difficult for a new mom to be confident enough to have faith in her decisions, but you have to figure out what works for you and your family and feel good about your decision. It's not about being a perfect mother: It's about doing the best you can every day.

From February/ March 2009